Forgiveness
Forgiveness. It’s often something that can be really difficult for a lot of us. Truthfully, we love to be forgiven when we are in the wrong, but we don’t always like to forgive when wronged. This is really interesting when you think about it, right? Don’t we want to treat others how we would like to be treated? Why is it so hard for us to forgive people sometimes? Simply put, it’s because we are sinful beings. We like to see people “get what they deserve.” As horrible as it sounds, when someone hurts us, we want them to experience pain, too. We don’t want them to get off easy and not suffer any consequences, right? The truth is though, we are not better than them! We are equally as sinful as those who sin against us. Ephesians 4:32 says, “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” When we are sinful and turn our backs against God, he always shows us grace. He forgives us and continues to love and pursue us. I challenge all of us, myself included, to practice this towards those who hurt and sin against you. Not forgiving and sitting in a place of bitterness is disobedience to the Lord. Forgiveness can be really hard and honestly really painful, but I promise you it will bring you more peace, joy and love than withholding that forgiveness.
When someone hurts you, betrays you, makes you feel small, etc. you usually have 1 of 2 options: you can find it in your heart to forgive them and pray for help from the Lord to move on, or you can hold onto it and let it fester, creating bitterness inside you toward that person. The second option may obviously be the easiest in that kind of situation. You may just want to shut down and sit in frustration and anger. I know I have done that far too many times. However, when I choose the second option, typically the only person that it truly bothers is me. I want so badly for that other person to know they hurt me, that I end up being the one that hurts more and misses out on the fun and enjoyable moments we could be having. Choosing the right thing isn’t always easy, but it challenges you and pushes you to be better!
I do want to clarify that I’m not saying it’s always just as easy as the flip of a switch and everything is going to be better! The pain you experience in these kinds of situations is not necessarily going to be easy to get over, and they definitely won’t always be easy to forget. Those painful moments are hard and that hurt is a valid emotion that you feel. However, it’s what you do with that emotion that will determine the path from that moment on. You can either walk in forgiveness, freeing you and your heart from the situation and drawing nearer to the Lord, or you can choose to let those feelings harvest inside you, causing you to experience more pain and bitterness and even allowing it to play into your relationships with other people. Speaking from experience, I promise that you will never feel better in the long run when you hold out forgiveness. Bitterness is a hindrance. Forgiveness is freedom.
Like I said before, forgiveness is hard, but it’s a heck of a lot harder if you’re trying to do it on your own! Thankfully, we can ask the Father to walk through these trials with us and we can be obedient in the forgiveness that he calls us to. Matthew 6:14-15 says, “And when you pray, make sure you forgive the faults of others so that your Father in heaven will also forgive you. But if you withhold forgiveness from others, your Father withholds forgiveness from you.” Holding out on forgiveness doesn’t just hinder your relationship with that other person, it also hinders your relationship with God. Just like that verse says, he will also withhold forgiveness from you. On top of that, withholding forgiveness leaves room in your heart for more bitterness than love. Through forgiveness, you will find so much freedom, and I think you’ll find a lot more joy there, too. ☺
Challenges:
Prayer!! Pray for the Lord to help you open up and find it in your heart to forgive. Sometimes the right thing isn’t always the easiest. Sometimes growth is painful. But is it worth it? Absolutely. To be in a place of abundant love and forgiveness is a really sweet place to be.
Surround yourself with people that will help push you. Community is so important for things like this. Have someone you can express your feelings and your struggles with, and that will pour into you and help walk you through it. Find people that also want to grow in forgiveness and spur one another on!
Love your neighbor as yourself. Mark 12:31 (talking about the greatest commandments) says, “The second is this: Love your neighbor as yourself.” This is such a great reminder for us in situations when forgiveness is really difficult. Love others and love them well. It is what the Lord calls us to do.
Prayer:
Lord, we thank you for today and that we get the opportunity to learn from you and from your Word! Thank you that you forgive us when we wrong you and that you still welcome us with open arms. I pray that you would help us to open up our hearts and find it in ourselves to forgive as you have forgiven us. Help us to choose love and to compassion, and to not let anger and bitterness into our hearts. May we strive to look more like you every day in all that we do. We thank you for your son and that we get to have a personal relationship with you! I pray these things in Jesus’ name! Amen!